


Let Out Your Air

by RhubarbDuck



Category: Tangled (2010), The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Other, Weed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21837799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RhubarbDuck/pseuds/RhubarbDuck
Summary: Normally, you’re not supposed to smoke when you’re pregnant. But that wasn’t going to stop the queen.
Relationships: Baby Yoda (The Mandalorian TV) & Marijuana, Eugene Fitzherbert | Flynn Rider & Marijuana, Rapunzel & Marijuana
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Let Out Your Air

*Fade in from black*

  
Our story begins in the highest of towers hidden deep in the trees of Nowhere. In the tower lives Mama G, an evil witch and her daughter, R Dawg. Of course, it is not her real daughter nor is it her real name. Rapunzel (R Dawg) was a princess taken from her family in the Kingdom of Somewhere. Don't worry, this is actually a very fun story. And it starts, with the sun. Now, once upon a time, a shower of sunlight fell from the heavens. And from these small drops of sun grew magic, golden, flowers. They had the ability to heal the sick and injured, as well as getting you stupid fucking baked. Well, centuries pass and a hop skip and a bump right away there grew a kingdom named Somewhere. The kingdom was ruled by a beloved King and Queen. And the Queen, well she was about to have a baby. Normally, you’re not supposed to smoke when you’re pregnant. But that wasn’t going to stop the queen. This is usually when people start to look for an edible. Or in this case, a magic golden flower. You see instead of sharing the suns gift, the woman who found the flower, Mama G, hoarded it's dank power and used it to keep herself young, hot, and stoned for hundreds of years. And all she had to do, was vape the special sauce.

All right, you get the jist. She smokes, she turns young, creepy, right? However, the kingdom of Somewhere found the golden flowers, and used the magic to help the queen get smacked. Her labor was a breeze. A semi-healthy baby girl, a princess was born. With beautiful golden hair. I'll give you a hint.

That's R Dawg.

To celebrate her birth, the King and Queen launched a fat cloud into the sky. For that one moment, everything was perfect.  
And then that moment ended.

Mama G used the rest of her stash in a last ditch effort to stay young, but ended up just getting baked and broke into the castle to steal the flowers, conveniently laid out in a basket by the King and Queen’s balcony. She took the flowers, and just like that...gone.

However, she didn’t realize the flowers were being used as bedding for the newborn princess, and in her state of regained sobriety, realized she had kidnapped the child. The Kingdom searched and searched, but they could not find the Princess. But deep within the trees of Nowhere, in a hidden tower, Mama G raised the child as her own, using the free labor to help plant a new, secret garden of flowers, that she dealt out to the anxious woodland folk. But the walls of that tower, could not hide everything. Each year on her birthday, the King and Queen released thousands of smoke clouds into the sky. In hope that one day, their lost Princess, would return.

Now here is where I come in. 

\--- 

Baby Yoda led Flynn Rider down the unfamiliar path through the trees to the hidden tower. Once again, their supply had run dry and they needed to reup from Mama G, the most reliable dealer in the forest. Recently, Baby Yoda and Flynn’s side gig had taken off, grabbing the attention of many potential clients as well as the palace guard. To stay off the radar, they were meeting Mama at the source.

Flynn was nervous about his first meeting with Mama G, and was doing his best to keep a close eye on Baby Yoda, who had mysteriously demanded he take Flynn’s cash to make the transaction by himself. Out of options, Flynn had to say yes to his slimy business partner.

The garden was lush with bright green flowers, towering over Baby Yoda’s tiny frame as he waddled through the rows. Soon, he was lost in the sea of green. Flynn, having never been to the garden, soon got lost. Cursing his little friend, he turned to the tower, hoping to meet back up with Baby Yoda there. Luckily as he was marching over, he spotted a girl among the flowers. 

“Hey!” he shouted, making his way over to ask if Mama G was inside.

Started by another voice, the girl turned around and whacked him over the head with the frying pan she was holding, a detail Flynn immediately regretted not noticing. While she had hoped such a blow would knock the young man out, instead all he did was scream.

“Jesus fuck, ow! I think you gave me a concussion!” Flynn shouted.

Having never been to a school, she did not know what that meant.

“I’m sorry!” she said, insincerely.

“It’s fine, whatever, but do you have any Advil or something?”

“No, but I’ve got a joint you can puff off of if you think it’ll help.” While saying this, she reached into her mangled hair, retrieving a half smoked doobie. “I don’t smoke myself, but Mama G was hitting this earlier today to ease her hip pain.”

Mesmerized by how little this women seemed to take care of herself, Flynn politely declined after further examining the joint. “No thanks,” he said, “I only smoke to help my nerves. It’s a bad habit to smoke your own stash, you know.”

“No, I didn’t,” the girl replied blankly.

Feeling an awkward silence coming, Flynn tried again to break the ice. “Hey,” he looked around confused, “have you seen a little green man?”

She gestures to the joint in his hand.

“No, like,” he sighs, rubbing his head, “my friend Baby Yoda and I are trying to restock.”

She shrugs, “Mama has probably left for her night job already, she wasn’t even selling today.”

Unsurprised, Flynn angrily cursed out his traitorous business partner. “Well what on earth am I going to do now? He and I agreed to sink all our savings into this gig. Wait, my money! That twerp up and stole my cash!”

The girl shrugged before going back to whatever it was she was doing. 

With the sun sinking into the sky and stuck in the middle of Nowhere, Flynn was starting to rethink the girl’s offer. “So,” he sits on the ground, resigned, “the kingdom is puffing the clouds tomorrow, wanna come?” 

“Not particularly,” she said without looking up. “I told you, I don’t smoke.”

“Wait, you were serious? You work with Mama G and you’re telling me you don’t smoke? I seriously don’t believe you.”

“Never really wanted to try. I’ve lived with Mama G since I was a kid, so it’s always been around. I just never took the plunge.”

Flynn tries to suppress his jealousy. “You’re pretty lame you know that, right?”

Rapunzel had never been called lame, since the only person she has ever talked to was Mama G. 

Just as Flynn was about to leave, they heard a strange rustling in the forest. “Did you hear that?” He asked.

Rather than simply shrugging like he expected her to do, she pulls him down and peaks over the rows of flowers. “Palace guards,” she whispers, seeing shining lights off in the distance. In a wild panic, Flynn--still holding the half smoked joint in his hand--ran off. Not knowing what to do, Rapunzel threw a nearby tarp over the entrance to the tower’s basement greenhouse before running after Flynn.

The two ran for what seemed like an hour, before Flynn slowed to a jog, looking behind them to double check the guards hadn’t seen them escape. When he saw the coast was clear, he let out a long, exasperated sigh of relief.

“Good lord, that nearly gave me a heart attack. I thought Mama G’s house was safe!” Flynn said as he turned quickly to the girl beside him.

She was slow to respond, trying to catch her breath and soothe her nerves. “I thought it was too! We’ve never been caught! Oh god, what am I going to tell Mama G when she gets back?”

Choosing not to answer, Flynn looked at the joint still clutched in his hand. Might as well TRY and calm down, he thought, taking out his lighter for a deep hit. Almost instantly, Flynn’s anxiety melted away. Forgetting their earlier conversation, Flynn tried to pass the joint to his new friend.

“I’m way too nervous to smoke, thanks.” Rapunzel glared at Flynn, figuring he hadn’t been listening earlier.

“It’ll help,” Flynn simply said between coughs. Rapunzel stood still for a second before caving to the new sensation of peer pressure, and took the joint from Flynn.

It didn’t take long until the two were on their backs, staring at the stars and enjoying their high.

\---

“-And that’s when I left the orphanage and changed my name to Flynn Rider.” Flynn finished his story, proud to have finally gotten it off his chest. 

Next to him, Rapunzel played with blades of grass, not having paid attention to Flynn for the past hour or so. “That’s crazy,” she said halfheartedly.

Flynn wiped away a tear. “Thanks, I have never opened up to anyone like that before.”

She shrugged. 

“What about your life?”

“You know normal stuff. Mama and I have been living in that tower for as long as I can remember. Just me, mama, and Pascal.”

“Pascal?”

She pointed to the empty space next to her, “My chameleon, Pascal.”

Realizing she was even higher than he was, he cracked a smile. “Oh, right.”

The two continued talking for a while, before Flynn started to realize his buzz was wearing off.

“Shit,” he said, “hey Blondie, you don’t have any more of Mama G’s bud in your hair, do you? Normally, I’d bring my own, but Baby Yoda kinda fucked me over today.”

Taking her time to dig around in her tangled mess, Rapunzel pulled out a toothbrush and an apple core before presenting another perfectly rolled blunt. “This is the last of what I carry around while Mama and I work in the greenhouse, we’d have to go back to get more.”

While eagerly grabbing the doobie from her, Flynn froze. “You don’t think the guards would still be around, do you?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know, but I wouldn’t risk it.”

Looking at the ground, defeated, Flynn soon perked up. “Wait, the cloud ceremony! It’s the only day the flowers are legal, they’ll have plenty to pass around!” 

“No, I’m good here,” she rolled on the grass and looked toward the sky. 

“It won’t be long till the buzz wears off and you won’t be able to go back if the guards are around.” 

She sat silently for a moment, contemplating whether getting up was worth it or not. “Shit. Ok.”

Flynn fist pumps the air. “Let’s go, Goldilocks!” 

Before she had time to correct him, Flynn had pulled R Dawg to her feet, and the two rushed off in the direction of the castle.


End file.
